Date Turns to Disaster in Stairwell Break-Up

           On the evening of February 1^st, Cameron Sheedy’s boyfriend ended their relationship in the stairwell of her apartment building, deciding after six months of dating that he did not in fact want a girlfriend. Francis’s decision to end their relationship came as a complete surprise to both Cameron and those with knowledge of the situation.

            The two had planned on having dinner at Momofuko Noodle Bar, and then spending the evening in, a pleasant plan for couples in New York City’s bitter weather of late. Plans first went astray when Francis arrived at 8:45 p.m. and claimed to not be hungry. Over an hour went by of awkward conversation between Francis, Cameron, and her roommate when Francis asked Cameron if they could have a word in the hall. Fearful and apprehensive, Cameron proceeded to the hall, and stood on the step looking up at Francis as he broke the news.

            Afterwards, Cameron tried to recount the situation, “All I can clearly remember him saying is, ‘I don’t feel right about us.’ After that I can’t remember anything exact, except something about our relationship never going anywhere. He kept saying he didn’t want a girlfriend. It’s all blurry, all I could do was nod and say ‘OK’”.

            For surrounding apartments, however, the situation was not so hard hear. The stairwell in the building is acoustic heaven, making the entire conversation audible to the neighbors. The resident of the adjacent apartment were taken aback when they realized what was happening in the hall, having seen Cameron just before her date was about to start, noting her great excitement to see Francis.

“She was so sweet and excited, I told her to have fun and not to be nervous,” neighbor Jay recalls, “I can’t believe this is what happened.”

“You should have worn a skirt and those heels” neighbor Will less than helpfully suggested.

Although Cameron was shocked and hurt, she remained positive and has faith that with help from friends she will soon recover.

The evening’s events were rather timely, as Cameron and her roommate had just finalized plans for their first annual “Suckentines Day: Party in the USA”, a party to spite the pressures of upcoming Valentines Day. The festivities are set to commence late on Saturday, February 13^th, and to continue through the weekend. The roommates hope to overcome society’s disregard for the benefits of being without significant others by having endless amounts of singleton fun.

“Suckentines just got so much better” Cameron stated, who hopes to have all of her shifts at work covered that weekend so as to consume copious amounts of alcohol without hesitation. Since grade school young children are taught to have great expectations on this commercial holiday, often leading to desperate disappointment and regret. Valentine’s Day is often a struggle for singletons, resulting in feelings of isolation, loneliness, and disapproval by society. Some even dread the holiday year round, while others only become victim to its emotional terror once they, like Cameron, find themselves single just before its arrival.